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Monday, December 17, 2007

dear diary,

there's this boy i like. lately he's all i think about. i know it's wrong, i know it's not meant to be, i know he would be bad for me but still, being aware dosen't make it any less prevalent. i say to myself "today i will no longer be affected by him" but then he says that something somethin' or smiles the certain way or shows me the attention i rightly deserveand i forget to hold fast to my "today i know...".

i questioned out loud to a friend yesterday "why dosen't he see me as a mark?" when i very well am and realize that i am. our first date had to be postponed by half an hour because he had to service a client. diary, you know, it was the "date" part of that statement that was wrong. what am i doing going on a date? furthermore, why am i secretly proud of the fact that our first date did not involve sex. sure, some stolen caresses while he slept and holding him while i fell asleep. almost even calling him by the name of he that i am reminded of by him.

oh the morbidity of it all.

2:01 AM

Comments:

Hello my name is Merle Dean Shamblin and I would like to be your new friend. I sure could use somebody to chat with. I am a 47 year old long haul truck driver who currently lives in Duncan Oklahoma. Dec 8th 1960 I was born in Fairview Oklahoma. Moved to Caddo and Washita counties where I attended school at Colony Hydro and Weatherford. My parents Malvin and Wanda Shamblin were cotton and peanut farmers. Dad died in 99 from lung cancer. Graduated from SWOSU with a business degree. My two sisters are LaDonna Hubert and Malva Burrahm. Dennis is my brother. I have been a truck driver for 14 years and have driven 2 million paid miles. I have received many safe driving awards over the years. I am single and have never been married. I have a wide range of interests and am pretty much an open book. Currently I drive a 2006 Freightliner for a major carrier. I dont go to Canada very often. I dont have a dedicated route so I run the entire lower 48. I enjoy reading cinema music sports travel etc. I am gay and versatile.

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